Picking up
I didn't know if I wanted to keep this blog going, but I suppose I will. When I posted the last post, I really, really felt angry and hopeless. Those feelings are starting to subside a little. I'm trying to accept the lot we've been given and I don't see any way to do that without restoring my trust and faith in God having a plan for us. I don't know that I'll ever see God in the "Abba" father role again, but I can't help but see Him as the master architect who is infinitely wise and acts according to what He deems best. So I have to acknowledge that while this part of my story is tragic, in the grand scheme of things, it has to be this way.
2 comments:
He is your Father, He loves you so much, You don't think he knows what it's like to lose a child? He knows that pain all to well, He knows it so well that I believe He weeps right along with us.
I get the part of not understanding why God would put such a strong desire in your heart only to take it away.. several..times..I get it, trust me. I even felt like a horrible wife, unable to give my hubby what he wanted so bad. But God did have a plan, a better one. Of course I could not see it at the time and maybe I didn't want to, but I am beyond thankful for all the pain that I went through and am still going through. You will one day feel that way, I promise you will. Allow your self to mourn, allow your self to get angry and sad and scream and cry, but do it WITH Jesus.
I love you! I know this is hard and it will get harder, but I am here for you.
Re: He got His child back.
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